The past year was harder than usual for everyone, with circumstances people haven’t had to deal with before. I know without a doubt that I’ve never had anywhere close to the hardships that I’ve had to face in 2020.
We launched this site in the beginning of last year. Part of the reason it was made was to help be an outlet and to give me something positive to work on that could also help other people. It gave me an idea bigger than myself to focus on and help me have a different purpose.
The way that contributors were sending their articles in was through Jpay, our institutional email service. The Jpay account that was being used was put on the forbidden contact list after we got a bunch of rejections for “entering into business” when money isn’t involved at all.
In March we were put on restrictions in here because of Covid. After that we were banned from Facebook, which was our main source of bringing awareness to the site. We had a Facebook page and used it to share on my page and people used to share it off of my page. We were removed for “not meeting community standards” and no more explanation than that.
During this time I was doing my legal work and not long after I put the finishing touches on my motions and filed them is when I started being harassed by the inspectors. This is also when I started doing research to file a lawsuit because of how the inspectors were retaliating against me for grieving them.
In August, my legal mail about what I had to do in order to refile my motions in court was tampered with, which basically stopped my process in the courts because between COVID and the holidays the courthouse hasn’t been open.
Then my facility was put on outbreak status and we were put on lockdown. I think its been about 2 months we’ve been on lockdown now. I caught COVID and that had me screwed up for a while. Then the holidays came and here we are.
With everything that’s been going on I lost a lot of my motivation to write and do what I can to develop the site. It took a backseat to a lot of things. This isn’t even considering my own internal journey that I’ve been on which significantly complicated everything even more. I also haven’t had an outlet for all my pent up frustration and stress to help deal with everything. I lost sight of some of my priorities. New Year’s Eve I hit my personal all time low with my mental health and when I woke up on the first I made the decision to get back to making my life better.
Those were some of my main problems in 2020 and why I haven’t been writing like I would of liked to. But its a New Year and what better time to start making positive change than the fresh start of a year. Because of everything that I’ve had to go through I’m a stronger and better person from it and I’m going to make this year better and mean more in a good way. I’m setting personal goals for myself, to continue to grow and better myself, to improve my relationships with the people I care about, to stay healthy physically and mentally, to put more effort into growing this site because of what it does for me and what I hope it can do for others, and to keep working towards my freedom.
I encourage others to do the same. A lot of people still have restrictions they have to live with, but we have to learn how to adapt and overcome. We all have things we can focus on that help ourselves, and others. Start exercising more, make new connections with people for things you enjoy (we all know there’s a Facebook group for everything), read a new book, learn a new skill, start making plans for what you want to do once this pandemic is over and do what you can to set the foundation for it. Try new things and find ways to make yourself happy.
if I can make things better from being in my cell, during lockdown for the COVID virus, without being able to see anyone on the outside for almost a year, knowing I’m legally supposed to be home and not dealing with all this from in here, and not being able to do the things that normally make me feel better, there’s no reason in the world why everyone else can’t.
Have a happy 2021 everyone!